Examinus Lazuli

Dear doctor:
My head aches, and my nose is runny. It's not a flu because I don't have a fever, and I feel sleepy only if I look at my revision notes. Perhaps I am allergic to paper? No? Oh yeah, I've written on them ever since I could write (or scrawl or doodle). In any case, do you think you could write me an excuse? I don't want to take my exams.

Thank you.
m.F.